The issue of having a second child does pose several important questions as regards most possible comfort for the parents as well as ensuring best relationship between the siblings. It’s little wonder if some couples find it hard to come to a conclusion about the best time for the second child. The age gap between the children is a swaying factor that sends many a parent into a state of dither.
Sure enough there are too many angles to figure if you get to consider the timing for the second little ‘un. Besides, there are several spacing scenarios all of which have their particular advantages and disadvantages.
You will find some of the salient points to be taken into account here:
Three years is believed to be the best gap between siblings
Most experts agree that if there is a spacing ideal for parents and children alike, it’s three years before your next one. In about three years’ time your first child has already settled down with a stable emotional condition and parents have had a much-needed breather and made up their minds whether they really want to enlarge the family.
Close spacing brings on early stage difficulties
Parents who had their kids close one after another find themselves having to handle two small bundles, two strident infants acting up who may at any moment break out in two different directions. Of course these difficulties will ease up after a while, but this will be a rather long and demanding while.
Close spacing is more convenient in the long run
When your children have grown some, they are likely to share interests, occupations and friends, and later attend the same school, so that you’ll find it easier to keep tabs on them. Also, they will easily settle down to the same daily routine.
Wide spacing is easy to deal at the start
If your older child has already turned three, he or she has enjoyed your undivided attention, and it may be easier to care for two when they need different kinds of care. An older sibling can be taught to be of help.
Wide spacing gets more arduous with time
When both of your babies are still young, it is easier to switch on from one to the other, but as they grow up the divergence will grow, too, You can get torn apart between schedules and needs that belong with extremely different lifestyles, both physically and emotionally.
Your parental time-span depends on your choice of timing
Kids with two years’ age difference mean that you’ll be a full-time parent for something like 20 years. If the difference makes 12 years, you’re in for a much longer spell, up to 30 years.
Siblings’ age spacing doesn’t influence compatibility
At a young age siblings who are not far apart can become good playmates – but as time goes by, the relationship between the siblings will be more and more determined by their personalities.
It’s worthwhile any way
If you feel besieged by the gravity of your decision and its impact on your life and those of your children, don’t let it prey on you. You may find that whatever time you’ve chosen for your second child to appear, things will come out right in the end.