How to Develop Trust with Your Midwife
Bringing a new life into the world is no mean feat and requires a lot of support, attention, and knowledge from all of those around you. You might be lucky enough to have this from your partner, family, friends, and colleagues, but how can you be sure that you will have it from your midwife? The nurses that support you during your pregnancy journey will need to have your complete trust if you are going to have the most relaxing time possible. Here are the top tips for forming a feeling of trust between you and your midwife.
Be Open and Positive
First of all, you will want to start by asking the name of your midwife and introducing yourself to them. Being on a first-name basis already establishes a closer bond between the both of you and allows personal topics to flow more freely. Try to meet your midwife in a good mood, and without any negative emotions if possible, to get you on good terms from the beginning. To ensure this, try to go to each midwife appointment with a full belly, since hunger and pregnancy are never an ideal combination.
You might be suffering from a difficult pregnancy and have not quite come to terms with how much your life is going to change. If this is the case, then be open with your midwife. These medical professionals have access to other means of care for you and will be able to refer you to a mental health professional if things aren’t looking too good for you in that area. Likewise, they should also know about any domestic violence in a relationship, since this could significantly impact the unborn baby and be seriously damaging for your own health.
Avoid Being Embarrassed
The previous point leads nicely onto the next tip, which is to not be embarrassed. Being open with your midwife is all about letting them in on how your body and mind are really feeling and not holding back any information that they should know about simply because you are too embarrassed. It is comforting to know that experienced midwives will have heard and seen it all before so it would be very rare for your case to be a first for them.
Get Personal
Your midwife will want to know all about your background and almost everything that is happening in your immediate life, although how much do you know about them? Most midwives will be happy to divulge their educational background with you and to real off all the practices that they have or haven’t worked for. You can also ask them why they chose this particular type of nursing since often they will have an interesting story as to why this was their chosen career path and where they studied for their role, e.g., Marymount University. This can give you a sense of peace as you discover that your midwife really will have seen it all and has all the qualifications necessary to back up her knowledge.
Don’t Be Late
Since the announcement of your pregnancy, you might be very busy all of a sudden. You’ll be continuing to work while getting increasingly tired, juggling time decorating your nursery, and searching for the endless list of equipment that you will need for your baby’s arrival. Nevertheless, try to plan your midwife appointments to fit around your schedule and leave plenty of time to get to them so that you avoid keeping your midwife waiting and causing any unnecessary stress. Being on time allows your midwife to see that you care about your pregnancy and you have respect for the time that she is taking with you to look after your journey and your baby.
Make a List of Questions
Having questions ready for when you pay a visit to your midwife is encouraging for them since they will understand that you are genuinely inquisitive about all the changes that are happening in your body and about to happen in your life. At times, however, you may think of a question that you would like to ask them but then baby brain strikes and you’ve since forgotten about your ever so important question. Therefore, it is a great idea to have a list where you can keep track of any new queries that enter your mind which you can take to your midwife and get answers to in a face-to-face scenario. This might start a conversation that can lead to the discovery of other facts that you might not have thought about, so it is always beneficial to have questions ready as a talking point.
Encourage Your Partner to Come Along
The earlier your partner gets to know your midwife and understand more about pregnancy, the more comfortable you will feel and the greater the trust that you will share. Encourage your partner to attend at least some of your appointments to meet the midwife that has been looking after you so that they can share the relationship throughout this journey. There may not be a lot for them to see and do during each appointment, although the fact that they have turned up is a great sign for the midwife and prevents her from having any queries about their support in the relationship.
Understand When It Just Isn’t Working
We are all very different people and sometimes you might come across someone else that you just can’t seem to connect with. If you have been trying to form a bond between you and your midwife which has left you running out of options, as your attempts have obviously not been working, then understand that it might be time to request another midwife. There is no need to be ashamed by this since you will have a much better pregnancy experience after dealing with somebody who can talk to you on a much deeper level and genuinely connect with you and your partner.
Hopefully, using these tips, you are able to share a sense of trust with your midwife as you enter this exciting stage in your life. However, remember that if you have tried everything and still aren’t feeling comfortable, know that you do have other options.