Which Kids Have Most Learning Problems?

Children go to school not only for knowledge but also to communicate, make friends, try on different social roles. Therefore, it is important that they come in contact with other children and adapt to the teachers’ requirements. However, not everyone succeeds.

1. Shy children

What is the problem? They are very timid and acutely aware of their own shortcomings, especially the imaginary ones. On the contrary, they do not notice and do not value their positive qualities. They are afraid that they will look ridiculous in the eyes of others and that they will say something stupid. It seems to them that they do not always correspond to someone’s expectations – they are dressed in a bad way, they do not behave well, etc. They hesitate in making decisions, do not take the initiative and cannot protect themselves. Because of this, they often fail to be noticed. As a result, there are unrealized opportunities, even greater dissatisfaction with oneself and “disconnection” from public life.

What should parents do?

Anything to increase the child’s self-esteem. You can strengthen his/her self-confidence and celebrate even the slightest achievements.

To create as many opportunities as possible for communication with peers, to expand the circle of acquaintances. Constantly talk about the benefits of communication: the child will find it easier to cope with timidity if he understands why he needs it.

Do not patronize excessively. Instead, provide the child with independence. Set various tasks related to communication (for example, let him go to the store and buy something).

Imagine various “terrible” situations. For example, you can rehearse the answer for a lesson or an interview this way.

Set realistic goals: address the class with a report, join the game of other children, ask the teacher a question. You can run a special calendar together and mark each task with an asterisk or a smiley.

Do not make the child feel ashamed of shyness – the effect will be reversed. Every time a son or daughter overcomes timidity, praise and reward them lavishly.

Send the child to some leisure club or circle. There is a theory according to which a six-year-old child should experience three social roles simultaneously – at school, in the courtyard, at a leisure club. His behavioral outlook widens.

Attend training in communication skills or go to some playgroup with the child.

2. Anxious children

What is the problem? They are afraid of everything connected with the school. They are afraid of writing tests, answering at the blackboard, making a mistake, getting a bad grade. At the same time, they are very diligent and too responsible, prone to the feeling of guilt. Because of constant stress, anxious children quickly get tired, it is difficult for them to switch activities. It is 6-year-old children in the first grades that are often inclined to feel anxiety. They can cry because of trifles or react to the teacher’s remarks very emotionally. This is called age-related anxiety, which passes over time. Another thing is if the child’s anxiety manifests itself in middle and high school. In this case, you must always consult a psychologist.

What should parents do?

• Mark the boundaries of the child’s responsibility. Do not demand too much. You can even recommend … to get bad marks at least once in a quarter.
• Constantly discuss anxieties and fears. The anxiety that is spoken about loses its power and strength, and fear can be got rid of. You can ask the child to tell or draw what disturbs him, compose a fairy tale.
• Discuss with the child their right to make a mistake. Tell him that mistakes are a very important experience. And the one who has learned to lose can win.
• Help to find the child’s cup of tea. Alarmed children, like no other kids, need something they are confident of.
• Create as many opportunities as possible to communicate with peers. Help to find friends with the same interests.
• Help the kid choose a “talisman”. It can be a favorite toy, a medallion, a pebble, a bracelet, which will help the child at the lessons, during the tests, and at the exam.
• Teach any technique of self-regulation – conscious breathing, visualization, etc.
• Understand and accept the child’s anxiety: you cannot just switch it off. If the child, for example, is afraid of the dark, let him fall asleep with light.

3. Aggressive children

What is the problem? They interfere with other children in the classroom and in games: they make petty dirty tricks, provoke the bullies, frighten the nervous kids and harass the weak classmates. They bother others and interfere in their affairs; they hide or spoil other people’s things. Curiously, aggression rarely takes the form of a physical attack. If this is a boy, he often fights like a girl: he bites, spits, scratches – in a word, he aspires to offend and spoil rather than to hit. The main goal of this child is the manipulation of others. Naturally, his classmates do not like him, but they find it unnecessary to come in contact with him, so he gets the status of “an evil genius” and is usually a castaway in his group.

What should parents do?

• Determine the cause of aggression. Perhaps the child is used to being the center of attention at home. Or, on the contrary, he lacks love, attention, and care. Aggressive children often grow up in families where the authoritarian style of upbringing is practiced. They may also become aggressive after a traumatic experience. Parents might also need to see a family psychologist.
• Stop the child who is provoking a quarrel with others. Explain to him what is happening, find out why he does so and what alternative behaviors are possible.
• Do not try to stop the quarrel, accusing the other child and defending your own one. Try to understand the causes of the conflict as far as it is possible. In general, it is not always necessary to interfere in children’s quarrels.
• Prevent the child from playing games and watching cartoons with aggressive content, actions, horror movies, and various programs, where motives of violence are present in one form or another. Discuss with the child what is happening on the screen and give your estimates.
• Do not use too strict measures to punish the child, including physical punishment and humiliation before other people’s eyes, etc. Be consistent in punishing the child. Punish him/her for specific actions.
• Demonstrate warm feelings to the child and give him a sense of security.
• Teach the child to express anger with words. Teach the techniques that relieve bodily tension (a jump rope, a punching bag, crumpling paper and cutting it into pieces, etc.)

4. Children with ADHD

What is the problem? Children with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder are spontaneous: they can strike when nervous, and in a minute they will not remember why they did it. Unlike aggressive kids, they do not have evil intentions. A child with ADHD is not bad or sneaky – he/she just does not know how to control impulses because regulating mechanisms of the nervous system are his weak point. Hyperactive children are restless, impulsive, and extremely mobile. They do not do their best; they do not listen and distract everyone. Besides, they do not feel comfortable in a group: children do not like them for pugnacity and inconstancy, and teachers – for complete inability to take part in the learning process.

What should parents do?

Set a clear daily routine and follow it day by day. Teach the child to plan his actions. Develop a schedule, give visual instructions – for example, “How to pack things for school” etc. – and hang them before the kid’s eyes. Compliance with the regime should be shifted to a neutral object (a timer, an hourglass etc.). Rest time is planned after every 20 minutes.

Choose a school with a regular curriculum and exclude additional workloads. Let the kid play longer and be engaged in a sports club to relieve physical tension.

Organize the workplace for the child correctly: minimize anything that can distract him/her. While doing the homework, there should be no loud sounds, no bright pictures, and toys, interesting magazines and books.

Minimize the kid’s “interaction” with a computer, a phone, a tablet, a TV.

Talk to him more often about the feelings that you and other people experience.

There should be unconditional love for the child. You should accept all his peculiar features. The child must be sure that you love him and that he is not at all terrible.

5. Left-handers

What is the problem? If right-handers are dominated by the left hemisphere, in left-handers the basic functions are distributed between the hemispheres in a more complicated way. Hence there are certain features of cognitive activity. They are more likely to encounter difficulties in learning to write, read, and count than right-handers since all those skills are based on the visual-spatial perception. Left-handers more often confuse similar geometric shapes (circles and ovals, rhombuses and rectangles), they can write letters as if they saw them in a mirror. It is more difficult for them to remember complex configurations of letters, and therefore they read more slowly and make mistakes when copying.

What should parents do?

Teach the kids to hold a pen in the left hand correctly and never force them to become right-handers. Notebooks for left-handed children would be great to have.

Develop the coordination of actions of both hands. Games and exercises with the ball, swimming, modeling, embroidering, knitting, weaving, kinesiological exercises, two-handed drawing, and playing the piano will be helpful.

6. Children who fall ill frequently

What is the problem? They not only miss classes and have to catch up with the school curriculum all the time. It is more difficult for sick children to comprehend it. They quickly get tired and irritated, are often anxious, reflective, and prone to emotional outbursts. Average students are more frequent among them than really good ones. In addition, such children are often excluded from the life of their group and suffer from low self-esteem.

What should parents do?

• Choose an adequate level of load – the right school and so on.
• Optimize the daily routine. The child needs to stay outdoors more often and reduce the time of being indoors.
• Teach the kid to take breaks while working, let the child rest after school for him not to get too tired.
• Pay attention to the child’s emotions, teach him to cope with anxiety, and develop a sense of dignity in him.
• Develop his communication skills.
• Do everything to prevent the disease from becoming a “secondary benefit.”